The boy is struggling. Grade 7 and now Junior High. Things have changed but not changed. He is still in the same school just a new wing. His friends are not the Older Kids but still the youngest of the Older Kids. It is the first year where the teacher's don't "hold your hand" through agenda writing and homework and other self monitored responsibilities.
Like Freshman Year at college, there is a spring board thrill of the freedom that comes with not being coddled. The 'keggers' of social lunch gatherings and after school activities spiral into a whirl wind of liberation that comes crashing down when the report card of " LA 44%, Math 52% and ... etc" crinkles in sweaty palms. The long death-row walk home to the parents giving lots of time to think and review and sweat!
Dman has hit that point. Infact, he has hit the point, hit his buddies, hit his fatigue line and hit pretty much anything near him EXCEPT his books! His 'party life' has led him to do a lot of things for peer-sake that has cost him the trust of his parents. Nothing earth shattering, each thing truly minor in the big scale of possible traps, but the path and 'big picture' is worth dealing with.
These Include;
- two physical fights with a boy that (in my mind) deserves to have D take him into a dark alley.
- 3 Detentions for failure to hand in assignments
- confrontation with best friend in playground
- mid term report card showing Failings
- passive aggressive avoidance of responsibilities at home
- signed up for Facebook while appearing to wait for permission to do so
As I said, all minor in and of themselves. When put together in an eight week period it makes for a pattern of conduct that I do not want to ignore. We have rallied the team of Teachers, Parents and Councellors and pulled together the support network around him again. I have made it very clear that " being the good guy" won't let him slide beneath the radar.
Now I just worry about going too far. Being " that mom" that is a source of embarrasment and hurassing for Dman. the Freaky Friday mom of " Make Good Choices!!!" that has his peers snickering behind their hands.
Sighs.